The Rainfall Testament
by threekingmodest101
Summary: The story has been discontinued on this website. Head to fictionpress and type the title in to read.
1. Prologue

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Mrs. Smith: "You said your name was Thanat?"

Death: That is correct.

A pale girl, and a pretty one at that. She sat to the right of me with a contradicting warm smile. She seemed interested in me for some reason.

Mrs. Smith: "And Werran?"

War: Yes.

A really buff looking jock built with muscles and aggression. He looked like the kind of guy who ran on Red Bull, piss, and anger. He glared at me as he sat in front of me.

Mrs. Smith: "I'm sorry if I pronounce this wrong. Sarvty?"

Famine: "That's me."

He sat to my left, also staring. Skinny and looking malnourished, he stared with soulless eyes.

Mrs. Smith: "And lastly, Khan."

Conquest: You are correct.

He sat behind me, medium weighted. He looked the most intimidating. A tactical looking student.

Death: I'll cut to the chase. We're interested in you because God sent us to down Earth to ensure you would become our leader.

Me: Say what?

Death: You're kind of cute, so I'll be nice. There's someone in this school who will activate the Rainfall Testament, which will trigger a disaster that will kill you. You, who are destined for great things as foretold by our leader. We don't know specifically, so we've been assigned to protect you.

What a pain in my ass. My day just went from 0 to 100 because of these 4. I wished for something interesting to happen in this boring purgatory, but a vague mission assigned by the 4 HORSEMAN? This will be the most exciting and horrifying days of my life, I can already tell.

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	2. Chapter 1: An intro to the Horsemen

Top of Form

 _Setting: Lunch. It used to be with my old group of friends. Justice, James, Aaron, and Sharon. Well, now it was occupied by the Four Horsemen. I beckon my friends away and got ready for a 12 minute briefing. Oh boy._

Me: So let me get this straight. From information gained by your boss, the Rainfall Testament is a weapon at this school that will activate when passed onto the Trigger, the person that will activate it.

Death: That is correct.

Me: My objective is to "fulfill my role as an Agnum to unleash the powers of the 4 horsemen on those who try to kill me or disrupt the goals of your organization."

War: Could we get on with this? Are you sure this kid's the one and we didn't just spook him?

Famine: Yeah I'm hungry. I crave pure flesh...

Conquest: This IS the one. All methods of behavior and analyzation of emotions dictate such. The briefing said so and we have to guide him. Control yourself "Sarvty", you're always hungry.

Death: The Big Boss wants us to protect you and unleash our powers to eliminate the target that will destroy you and bring about the end of a great future. Yes, all of that is correct. Do you want to know more about us?

An inquisitive question, and yet I feel she really wants to know more about me. In other ways that I really don't want to know of right now.

Me: Yes. If your intel was able to find out that the Trigger was at this school, what's to stop your group from knowing who it is? If so, why do you need me to "activate" you guys and kill the Trigger? Couldn't you do it yourselves? Is your boss God? What powers do the agnum have? Is this like Fate/Stay Night where you're my servants? Will Sarvty eat me?

Death: Some information was not disclosed by the Big Boss, and some information he does not know. We need you because you have to activate the seals on our powers to find our targets. Our powers have been laid dormant for this mission and other missions that we have carried out. Those restrictions are necessary to ensure the safety of bystanders and you will control the usage of our powers. Big Boss is not God. He is one in a long line of mortal entities called the Gatekeeper that watches over Earth. As said, the agnum activates the seals on our power and lets loose our collective abilities to protect you and ascertain the identity of the Trigger. We are not your servants. We have our own free will and will act like our own selves, but will always protect you as it's our number one priority.

Conquest: And Sarvty will not eat you at all. All odds point to a 99% probability he will consume someone else before the end of this mission, however.

War: I'll punch his face in if he tries. Anymore questions pipsqueak, or are you gonna buy us lunch?

Famine: Yes... I crave the good stuff.

A cute girl that would fit into any clique, a jock with anger issues, a nerd with an absurd amount of brainpower, and an edgy skinhead with appetite issues walk into a bar. The bartender asks: What would you like? They respond: It's raining a lot outside. How about some Rain vodka.

I'll need more than 4 drinks to keep these guys under control. I'll have to find a way to not have them seduce me, punch out everyone, get caught in a cheating scandal, or get in a school incident with biting. My day just got a hell of a lot more interesting.

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	3. Chapter 2: School and their new home

The school. Rosemount Academy, an academy for those past high school age who want an alternative way for higher education. Privately owned and ran by a businessman for the genuine purpose of giving kids an opportunity they might not find in college or trade schools, this school offers subjects taught both in colleges and trade schools. It has legitimate standing with the government, and degrees granted from Rosemount Academy get many kids where they need to in life. Smaller than a campus and bigger than a high school, it has many facilities to assist students. Indoor swimming pools, gyms with an abundant supply of ANY sports equipment, any sport is fair game unless it kills someone. Classrooms have air conditioning and endless school supplies. Of course, students have to walk there. It houses 13450 students and has 125 teachers for various subjects. Also has 1452 other staff for maintenance. Most of work is done by Artificial Intelligence and monitored by private security company owned by the businessman. There are 10 principals and 25 counselors. There is one Viceroy to oversee the Hierarchy, and he reports back to the businessman. And I'm above average. Of course, I could be higher, but I don't work hard enough for the spot.

The quartet were called exchange students, but nothing searched on them indicated anything specific. Their transcripts were spotty at best, and were lacking of many necessary details. I may have to assist them with that.

Calculus, Statistics, the American Dream, Philosophy, Psychology, and Planet Earth. That is what I am learning. How mundane, you wonder. What is the importance of this information? Well you see, the quartet is somehow conveniently in all of my classes. And they always sit next to me in the same positions. I don't know what's worse, the fact that Death keeps staring at me, War keeps wanting to fight people, Conquest keeps thinking of wack ass schemes I know will work, or Famine wants eat something. Managing them all is a pain in the ass. In the 2 weeks we've been together, I've managed to go 4 days before one of them fucked up. That would be Famine. He tried to eat the globe that was sitting on Professor Layton's desk in the American Dream 10 minutes before class. I made him unswallow it and cleaned up the globe before we got to the early bell. And I have so many damn metaphors for that.

Also the school doesn't have extracurriculars as work is too intensive, thank fuck. There are sports teams, oh fuck. I won't have to worry about dragging them out of confrontations with scared friends and classmates. I will have to worry about them being too good and attracting attention. I walk home, and they follow 20 feet back. I catch up with my friends and talk with them.

Justice: James is putting together a paintball tournament practice this Sunday against some other classes. Want to come?

Me: I made up my mind up at James, of course I would. Would you guys mind if I invited my new friends?

Sharon: Of course Andrew. We could use the extra firepower considering we keep losing the scrimmage rounds.

Aaron: Yeah. Catch you guys later. _pulls me aside as my friends walk home_ What do you think of the quartet? Seems weird they'd just drop in here.

Me: They seem alright. They all have weird quirks to them, but they seem like alright guys.

Aaron: Sarvty tried to eat a globe. Are you sure this is company we'll be fine with?

Me: Relax, I said they're alright. They're chill, like I said, and are staying with me. Nothing bad will happen.

Aaron, nodding unconvincingly, walks towards his house. The horsemen catch up and immediately question me.

Death: Who were they like. Who was that girl with you? Do you like her?

Conquest: These subjects were ridiculously easy. How could you be doing so mediocre? I will help you get A's in every single subject.

War: No Extracurriculars? Thank god there's a Football team where I can bulldoze people and let off STEAM! GO ROSES!

Me: What a pain in my ass. Y'all gotta chill. I have friends Thannat, Sharon's not my girlfriend. I know I'm lazy Khan, and that's inexcusable of me. And sports teams would be a great idea if I wasn't scared of you bulldozing everyone Werran.

Me: Famine's been quiet today.

War: Famine's been a little shaken up. He's had a flashback to some unpleasant memories. You'll have to ask him what's up if you want to. He hasn't told us anything.

That will go for later, after we get back to home. After a mile of walking, we come up to the side door (could be called the main door since there's no front door).

The kitchen is seen upon entering, with a dining room to the left and living room to front. Past living room, TV room to right and Piano room to left. Upstairs is bedrooms. I live alone because one parent is managing restaurant and can't be back for months, and other is on a flight to business meeting with businessman.

Me: I'll have to ask you guys not to make a mess and fuck around. I informed my parents that you'll be staying. Conduct yourselves responsibly. I'm letting you guys live here, but my parents will be back in 4 weeks. My mom is a Superintendant of the Rosemount branch of the Karpat Restaurant chain, and my dad is a businessman on a meeting with the businessman that owns the academy. If you guys make a big mess, my parents will flip their shit. Don't do that. And no Death, you cannot sleep with me, as that's probably what you're thinking. They'll flip their shit even more if they find out I've been fucking one of you.

Death: I wasn't thinking that... baka (I'm really not fucking convinced, and she isn't a tsundere, this was my brain's lame attempt at making an anime joke)

Me: Before we rest for the night, do you guys want some food?

Eagerly saying yes, they wolf down some klondike ice cream bars I got in the fridge and dragged their things upstairs. Then they went to their sleeping places.

War took the couch, Famine took the second living room couch, Conquest took the dining room, and of course, Death took the bedroom next to mine. Now to hope that in 6 weeks my bedroom doesn't become a shitfest of male testosterone and temptations.

I went to sleep, the last thought being some hypothetical scenarios that might play out tomorrow.


	4. Chapter 3: Death vs War

Setting: Living room of my house the next day. The clock ticks, broken and behind by a second. Currently studying Planet Earth because I don't try and Khan doesn't tolerate it.

Conquest: You're telling me in a class as easy as this, you manage to get straight C+'s on every exam before this. It would logically be improbably unless you decided to fuck yourself.

War: And you continuously mess up the easiest shit. Seriously, El Nino is colder on the right side of the Pacific and La Nina is colder on the right. And it's particularly easy to tell where temperatures are different. Good god, I'm not as bright as "Khan," yet I still do a hell of a lot brighter than you.

Famine: Yes, and meandering streams and braided streams are so easy to tell apart. For a fairly nice guy, you really aren't the most hardworking one. If you really tried, you could easily pass this kind of shit and distinguish yourself.

Death: What a pain. Look, we love you (I'm sure you do), but we need you to fulfill your end of the bargain as well. You must overcome your own weaknesses as I'm sure you'll help us overcome ours.

War: Speaking of weaknesses: Thannat, let's go spar outside. I'm feeling a little rusty since it's been so long since our last matchup. "Sarvty" and "Khan" can come with. I bet pipsqueak still has some questions for us.

With that, we drop our studying and walk outside. Thank god they are required to have restriction seals otherwise they'd probably nuke the block. Or worse yet, the entire town. Fuck, this is going to be hard to control.

Death: Remove Restriction Power Seal 10 on Werran and me. As you probably already know, 10 seals for 10 degrees of power. You probably don't know there are two ways to activate, vocally and mentally. Each has drawbacks. Vocal activation increases power of effect, but has low range needed to activate. As long as we can hear you, the power seal will activate. Mental activation has unlimited range, but the location of the Horsemen must be known to gain activation. You will use your mind to activate for this round. We will try vocal activation another time.

Me: **Yes. Your actions are by my command. Death and War, it is by the calling in my voice that I ask you to stand and fight in my name. Remove Restriction Power Seal 10 and operate at the lower limits of your power. Your orders are to fight until either of you is incapacitated. You are forbidden from damaging anything beyond the street and any buildings either of you use for support will result in the automatic termination of your power seals. Are my instructions clear?**

Death and War: Yes, your magnificence. Your directive is our command.

With that, they transform. Death gains wings and purple body armor covering her like a dress. She wields a massive scythe that can be detached by the front end that allows her to grapple onto objects. This scythe as it's height can cut through dimensions and through buildings at it's weakest, but I didn't know that yet. A deathly aura emanates from her and her appearance becomes more skeletal. War gains Golden Roman like armor and a has what could be described as steel gloves with many miniature spikes on them. His punches hit like an Abrams tank missile, and can instantly collapse a building. He becomes bigger and more muscular, becoming as tall as big as the small condo next to our house. He gives off an air of rage pent up from, I'm guessing, a couple years of bad memories.

They rush at each other, faster than the eye can see. I can only glimpse War's smug grin and Death's sly smile at me before they collide in a mash of purple and red aura. I couldn't really see the intimate details of what was happening, but let's just say the street where the fight took place had a lot of scratches and craters.

From what I could make out of it, Death can fly, as the Grim Reaper probably should. It's quite stunning actually, seeing such an efficient fighter go up against a monster of a tank. She dodges with insane speed, going over and under War's punches, each of which shift the air around it in mini-tornadoes emanating from his arms and leave small dents in her armor. She slashes at him, her lightning fast (metaphor because people have quoted lightning feat in Dragon Ball as a speed feat, and I am not having that fucking headache of a powerwank from any dipshit nerds who want to argue semantics about speed) strikes slice his armor and gloves, knocking off spikes and leaving scratches on his armor.

They go at it for hours, neither backing down or giving ground. Famine got some popcorn, and looked off inquisitively into the distance with a confused look for some parts of the fight. Perhaps some memories too? I'll have to talk with all of them before this ends.

Conquest nudges me, signalling he wants to talk.

Conquest: The probability of us being seen is only about 4%. The businessman took care to clear the neighborhood by giving them free vacations. (Vacations in the 3rd month of Academic studies? Who is this guy and how powerful is he?) I sense a 0% chance of any neighbor reneging on this deal and a 3% chance we will encounter an enemy.

Me: Wait, an enemy?

Conquest: Yes, naturally being the 4 Horsemen, we are accustomed to coming under attack by enemies. There are those who wish to take your command and use us for nefarious purposes. Trivial and mundane affairs such as conquering the world or getting rich. Humans who do such things bore me, as there is only a 1% chance of those dreams coming true. I feel it is strongly improbable, however, that we will encounter an enemy today like I said in percentages. We should call off the duel as a precaution.

Me: It is getting quite dark. **Death. War. Stand down and relinquish your power. Restriction on Power Seal 10 has been reimplemented and no further fighting is required on my behalf.**

Death and War: Yes your magnificence.

Death: Thank fuck, we can finally break character and stop roleplaying as a bunch of knights. How did you think of our fight?

War: Pip, what'd ya think? Were you impressed by the amount of power I unleashed?

My name is not Pip, and I think if you don't stop calling me that, Death will get some funny ideas about potential nicknames.

Death: Yeahhhh Pipppp? Were you impresseeddddd?

Me: Your fighting is very impressive and you all are worthy fighters. Next up would be Conquest and Famine.

War: I would prefer you'd use our cover names.

Death: And I would prefer if you stopped acting all royal. It's cute hearing you, but it sounds obnoxious to beat it into the ground.

Me: Sorry about that, let's go inside and plan for the Paintball scrimmage.

We walk inside and take a break, Death and War trying to outdo each other in terms of nagging about who beat the other like a bunch of comic nerds raging about whether Goku or Superman were stronger. What a pain in my ass. I'll have to figure out how to control them even with the power seals.

Outside, 3 miles down the road on top of a radio tower, an unknown scout kept watch with high powered binoculars from the middle of the fight to the end, not seeing the weapons or armors clearly enough, but being able to ascertain the identity of the Agnum.

Scout: I have found the target your lordship seeks. Should I call in the Gravedusters?

Unknown superior to scout (may or may not be encountered in the future depending on how fucked I am): No, I would prefer to wait until we know exactly what the powers of these ... Horsemen are. The Gatekeeper has done well to keep their powers a secret, and is a crafty son of a bitch. Clearing out all witnesses in the neighborhood for 2 miles is a smart move. We shall wait and observe the Agnum and his Horseman. Then we shall ascertain the identity of the Trigger and do some persuasion. Only afterwards shall we engage the Agnum. Are we clear, Tyren Beck?

Tyren: Yes High Dragon. I shall observe the activities of the Agnum.

Unbeknownst to all that, I reluctantly receive tutoring from Conquest and some not so kind words of encouragement from War. Can't wait to see what sort of shit comes next.


	5. Chapter 4: The beginnings of an argument

_Setting: Sunday walk to the academy. 2 weeks and 3 days have passed. 6 days since the practice between Death and War. Paintball scrimmage is a thing, and my homeroom has lost every single fucking time for the last 2 months._ *

Let's be honest here: we were already undermanned to begin with. There were my friends, and a couple of random guys who didn't really give a shit. That makes 9 in the homeroom, much less than the maximum allowance of 16. Now we have the 4 Horsemen, and it will be interesting to see how this scrimmage plays out. I mean, we have enough manpower to at least be a proper team against the other homerooms, but I'll have to make sure these guys don't attract any of the wrong attention. As I am lost in thought, Famine and Conquest get into some ridiculous argument about the proper nutrition an army runs on, or whatever the fuck that's supposed ot mean.

Conquest: It is the prerequisite of all soldiers in an army to have the essential amount of calories and nothing more. Only the amount dictated by logistical command can hope to suffice.

Famine: And that's a perfect excuse to give bullcrap to soldiers. Y'all experts shoot the same spiel about nutrition when you just take all the good shit for yourselves. You higher ups always take what you want without excuse.

Conquest: And you guys always complain without realizing what we put in for you ... Don't think we'll tolerate anyone with appetites bigger than what the army could hold?

Famine: And you guys are too arrogant. Always snobbering around like you own the damn place without doing grunt work. Why don't you come into battle with us and see what it's really -

Me: That's enough squabbling you too. You sound like an old married couple about to fail going through on another separation only to end back together unhappily. Paintball practice is just ahead, save the squabbling for home Mr. and Mrs. Horseman.

This only leads them to start yelling at me, making me regret making that joking remark. Goddamn these guys are scary when they're pissed. I feel bad for what the opposing team is going to end up with if they end up on their bad side.

We enter the facility and take to the lockerrooms to put on our already assigned gear. Thank lord for the businessman. The Gatekeeper was somehow able to convince the businessman to help us with a few favors by calling the horsemen some very bright exchange students, then was able to pass them through by getting a couple of favors to work. Long story short: A shit ton of more money to the businessman land grants to use some property of the Gatekeeper in exchange for the indirect and anonymous (obviously not to us since we were informed by the higherups at the Tower of Glass (this is the only time I will use parentheses inside of parentheses: it is the base of the Horseman and other personnel of the Gatekeeper)) support in our endeavors such as the clearing of neighborhoods. Of course, backed by our friendly neighborhood and mysterious Gatekeeper? Who the fuck is this guy anyways, that he makes them all, especially Famine, gush so lovingly about?

I must have spaced out, because I feel off the bench in full gear that pushed into my clothes when I hit the ground. Ow.

War: Wake up Pip. We have to leave for Scrimmage remember?

Me: Fine, fine. I'm coming.

I head out into the arena of **DOOM** (not really) and meet up with the other 3.

Conquest: You're late. I now sense a 32% chance of uncertainty that we will not be able to follow your instructions as clear since there is a possibility you will rush your instructions due to time constraints.

Me: I believe Khan went over this with you, Thannat. We'll have to -

We are interrupted by a loudspeaker voice by the Businessman getting hyped over a match like this. He must be watching during the business meeting. Oh crap, this means my dad's watching me. He'd probably be happy I made some new friends, but he'd be disappointed if I lost this match. I mean, he's not strict, but he sure as fuck would hate to see my homeroom lose again.

 **COOOOOOMMMMMMMMMBBBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNTTTTTTTTSSSSSSSSSSSSS! ARRRRRREEEEEEEEEE YOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUU RREEEEEAAAADDDDDDDDDYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?**

Never been more ready to get my ass whooped. The other homeroom is packed with guys who've been playing paintball since they were kids. Even with the abilities of the Horsemen, we shouldn't be able to beat them. Especially since they only just learned how to play.

Death: Move and shoot, right? Don't get hit or you get out of the game. We will protect you on the field. Don't worry.

She passes a sly grin, one that I might perceive as with respect and a tinge of attraction. It lasts for about 5 seconds before she looks forward and changes face to a battlehardened warrior.

 **3...2...1...FFFIIIIIGGGGGHHHHHTTTTTTTTT!**


	6. Chapter 5: The Worst Confidence Breaker

_Setting: Paintball. We're getting fucked._

Usually at this point the main character magically discovers this innate bullshit Deus ex Machina ability where he says some inspiring crap any normal dumbass could think of and leads his team (consisting of him and his main supporting characters) to victory. Yeah, that's not happening. Shit doesn't work like that. To tell you the truth, we were too disorganized and out of the 13 of us, 4 got knocked out and there were just my friends and Horsemen. Now you're going to ask "Oh but dude, didn't you contradict yourself?" No, because some unexpected shit happened that ended the paintball match abruptly.

Businessman: The match has been canceled. I'm afraid there has been an emergency shutdown of the facility from an outside source and we don't have an idea of where it came from. Everyone return your gear to their assigned areas and exit out the Emergency Exits immediately.

Death got separated from us in the fight, and was on the other side of the stadium during the power outage. We decided to go back to our respective locker rooms and waited outside for Death to change. _Sigh_ , even for an immortal being, she still takes a long time.

Conquest: There is a 64% probability that this was the work of someone wanting to provoke an encounter. Of course, other than the Trigger, there are others who do not wish to obtain the Rainfall Testament and want only our powers. As you've had little practice getting down the intricacies of power control so far, I advise you duck this one and wait until later.

After meeting up with Death, we walked outside the building and take an alternate route home. We walk quickly and quietly, going through back alleys and passing through empty backyards in an attempt to throw the assailant off our scent. Death masks our signatures, the term for every living person's mark on this Earth. Everyone has one and skilled enough people can apparently track it. Good thing we have a master disguiser in Death. Hopefully I don't have to run into him while I'm unprepared.

War: Normally I'd be itching to punch out whoever might come kill us, but I'll agree with "Khan" here. Whoever wants to come here and attack us while we're in public must be very confident he can win.

Famine: I can smell him –

Me: You can smell him? Could you get a complete read of his identity? (Bad joke)

Famine: No, but I can say that he's starting to get closer. I don't know how he knows where we are, but he's closing in on us even though we've exited the building and are taking an alternate route back home.

Death: We've jumped through backyard after backyard under the direction of Conquest to gain the highest possible ability to run away. War can't see anyone for miles. I have cloaked our signatures, so we shouldn't be getting seen. Famine can still smell him getting closer. And yet, who is this person that continues to chase us after all this effort? Better yet, how powerful is he?

Unknown: I don't think you should be asking yourself what I'd been doing; you should be asking yourself what you haven't been doing.

A cloaked figure leapt off a telephone pole 20 meters from where we stood. How did War not see him?

Me: How can you not see him War? He was 20 meters to the North-East, following us this whole time.

War: I couldn't. This guy didn't give off any visual or auditory cues.

Conquest: Oh, very clever stranger. I see what you've done.

Unknown: Smart isn't it? You're very lucky I'm not here to kill you today. I'm only to observe your powers. Unfortunately, we didn't really get a glimpse of that, now did we.

Conquest: You could've let the Paintball match keep going, and then you would've had a 43% probability of being able to see them in action. Why did you stop the match?

Unknown: See, I had a feeling y'all were going to lose. I don't think your main character is the tactical type, and from the looks of it, you don't seem to have trained much.

Unknown: Since I know your identities, and you don't know mine, it would be rude to keep you in the dark. My name is DeGiorno Brownstein, and I am an assassin of the Holy Long Knives.

Me: That sounds so fucking edgy and you should be ashamed it's so edgy. Great, first person we meet and he's a crazy person.

Famine: Don't provoke him. I got a really nasty scent from this guy. He smells like he's just itching to attack us.

DeGiorno: You've got that right Famine. You're looking skinnier than usual. And our purpose is just to observe your actions and see if they align with our motives. I'll go as far to say we would like to have your assistance sometimes as well. So, what do you say? Symbiotic relationship or nadda?

Me: That would be a no. I have no guarantee you're not itching to steal my friends' powers, and I will not let that happen to them.

DeGiorno: That's a shame. I'll have to take this information and pass it on to my boss. He won't be happy about that. Oh, and a couple more things before I go.

DeGiorno: I can create copies of myself that can perform the same actions I can, except they don't give off a signature. That's how I've been observing you. And that Electrical power failure that never happens to buildings of the Businessman? Caused by me. And electrical power surge from concentrated lightning on the fairly strong infrastructure of the building.

War: Wait, how could you get past my sight? I can see anything from a mile or so away, so how come I couldn't see you?

DeGiorno: See, my copies can also be rendered invisible and I can jump from copy to copy. That's why Famine here got confused about where I was since he perceived me as always moving far away and closer at the same time. I had clones observe your path from the beginning.

DeGiorno: And how I found you? Easy peasy. My organization tipped me off to your location, and sent me here to observe you. After causing the power outage, I fired the tiniest of trackers onto Death's back that you probably didn't notice at all. Conquest, you have failed at thinking your way past this.

Me: You piece of shit. Now you made him dejected. Fucking apologize.

DeGiorno: Now I must take my leave, but one final word. There are others here who want your power. You should train in order to give us all a worthy competition.

Laughing his ass off, he transports away, leaving a pile of clone dust that disappears into the wind. Shaken by the news, we get Conquest back home and plan for our new enemies.


	7. Chapter 6: Death's tragedy

_Setting: Home after encounter with creepy long knives. There is a palpable tension in the air that one encounters from a lack of preparation._

Everyone feels like shit. Tense movements from Conquest and an orange energy that emanates from his body starts to flood over him. He looks as if he's experienced this kind of situation before. Death carries a sad look. I'm guessing she's experiencing some déjà vu as well. War went outside to punch some trees, and Famine spent the last half hour rinsing out his sinuses and mouth. And I'm stuck here trying not to let a few volatile super beings get too pissed off. Sure, I can control their powers, but I'm not so certain that I could hold these guys back from killing each other.

Conquest: More adversaries, more people to defeat, more problems to deal with. (Walks to the stairs and yells upward) "Sarvty, you can stop rinsing out your mouth and sinuses already. You're being loud and wasting wasteful.

Famine: Like you're one to talk. We wasted all this fucking time trying to climb over houses and shit like a bunch of homeless guys trying to find a warm house. Even through all your CAREFUL planning, you still fail at getting us through this.

Conquest: And your nose was unreliable. All this shit about "being able to sense anything" with your senses, fuck out of here. You couldn't sense crap with all the shit you ate before this ma –

Famine: **MY SENSES WORKED!** Still can't say the same about your tactics. Even while I tried to get us away from the douchebag, he still fucking found us with your slow fucking idea. What the hell did you think was going to hap –?

Conquest: **BEST POSSIBLE STRATEGY** , which you wouldn't know if I stuck it up your ass and left it in there. You couldn't give a shit about doing the thing that will save all of us, so long as everyone gets hurt you wouldn't mind living. NO ONE HAS TO DIE HUH?

Famine: You wouldn't know how to care about the rest of us. Always going for logistics, fuck logistics. Just cause something's the most efficient route, doesn't mean it's going to be the most satisfactory. So long as you get your results, you wouldn't care if the rest of us jumped off a cliff and died. Everything is so fucking great with your plans. So long as we follow your instructions, one of us is guaranteed to die –

At this point, the both of them must have been really fucking pissed off. Like, Incredible Hulk realizing the Illuminati were responsible for building the spaceship that killed his wife and blew up his planet pissed off. The both of them overrode the Restriction Power Seal I placed on their Level 10 powers and started to form up their battle gear. I caught a glimpse of Conquest and Famine's weapons. A massive steel broadsword 1 and a half times the size of Conquest, and what could be described as a combination of a battle-axe fused with a spear. Conquest wore a knight's armor, with a lion's pelt covering his back. I could tell the pelt also had steel layered on the bottom of it. Famine wore just a cloak over him. I got the feeling his bones were very strong underneath that as he turned fully undead. Unfortunately, if I don't stop them they might nuke the house and anything within 3 miles.

Me: That's fucking enough from the both of you. Shut the fuck up you dumbasses, put your weapons away (you did not have permission to take them out anyways) and actually think about what the fuck just happened. We were observed by someone that was able to bypass the strengths of our party. Invisible clone placeholders that can keep watch and only become visible when the real thing makes an appearance. He outclassed us. It's fucking fine. We'll have those opponents and we have to work towards figuring out a way to beat those opponents.

Conquest: It's not fine. (Tears in his eyes, likely from past memories) It's going to happen again. It's going to happen again. Zylam, Yan, Edgarth, Brin. I can't let it happen again.

Me: What's wrong Conquest? You could tell u –

Conquest: (Interrupting that sentence) NOT RIGHT NOW! … I don't really feel like talking about that. I'll be in the Dining Room.

Conquest walks to the Dining Room and plops down on the first seat entering the room. He looks at his feet dejectedly and ponders how he should get out of his hopeless situation.

Famine went to the Living Room couch. He lied on top of it and stood at the ceiling, possibly pondering how he could fix the situation.

I walked out towards the side door to tell War to come inside when Death grabbed my hand. The touch of her hand chilled me to the bone. I sensed a supernatural sense of dread, that bottomless pit that forms in one's stomach when they face the unknown. But Death hadn't come to take my life, she'd come to have a talk about saving others. I could see tears forming in those piercing eyes of hers as she got me to sit down on the bench near the side door.

Her head rested on my shoulders; a weary ancient being wanted to have a talk. Before I could open my mouth, she began.

Death: Do you know why I'm the only immortal on this team? And do you know the stories of the other members before these three?

She's starting to really tear up at this point. I could feel a volcanic eruption of sadness about to explode all over us. Cautiously, I put my hand around her shoulders. I patted her like a friend listening to one of their friends break up with their boyfriend. Unlike those types, I wasn't looking for romance.

Death: You'll have to talk with the other three about their pasts, but I'll talk about mine.

At this point, she's really starting to cry. I get up for a couple seconds to get some tissues and help her wipe the tears off her face. Sniffling, she continues with her sentence.

Death: I was a little girl in a faraway land. It sounds cliché, but I was born in what is now known as Eastern Europe. My family was a small clan called the Shiams. We were looked down on by other larger clans that were intolerant of our beliefs. They called me the devil for our religious practices, and constantly bullied us by stealing our supplies and throwing rocks at us.

Death: One day, I walked into my house to see my parents hanged by the roof of our house. My younger sister, taken captive into a larger clan to use as a servant and my pet bird had its legs ripped off and wings gutted of feathers. I knew who had done it. It was the three twiddling fuckers from the Garcoms that acted like spoiled brats and generally bullied everyone, especially our clan. So, I bid my time. One day, I got all of them alone, separately. We were at a wedding and got them all to meet at certain locations. I stabbed one to death with the knife that skinned my bird. I got one of them and choked him to death with the same rope that hung my parents. And I killed the last one by bludgeoning him to death with the mace that they used to break the hands of my sister. I was immediately arrested as they knew who it was that would try and kill them. I honestly didn't care. You could ask why I couldn't save my sister, but they sent her off to a faraway land. At that point, I was too far gone and didn't care about anything except my inevitable execution. But the Gatekeeper saved me. He walked through a portal and extended his hand towards me. He appeared before my cell and asked me if I minded being the first of the 4 Horsemen to be created. He promised that if I took the job, I could potentially find answers to what happened to my sister and prevent situations such as these from happening again. At that point, he was the only one in the world who cared about me.

Death: There were other teams before this, other Horsemen. Some are immortals, some are mortal, as they could choose whether to gain an immortal power boost or keep their identities intact. One by one, every Horseman was either killed on missions or retired. New ones always came in and were dealt the same fate. Every single time, I wasn't able to properly keep them from falling apart. I was treated like an outcast just like with my clan. No hurtful words, just distrust towards the Eastern European immortal who doesn't look like she could prove herself useful of anything. I thought the only one I could turn to was the Gatekeeper. But even he was busy with his work and watching over the Planet. Then I found you.

Me: What made me so special, Dea – I mean Thannat? I always noticed you glancing at me inquisitively during class and always lighting up with happiness when you saw me after class.

Death: You were different. You were different because despite your lazy streak, your incompetence in school, and your stubbornness, I saw something underneath that stone-faced exterior I found interesting. Remember the day that we were called into homeroom?

Me: I could remember it like the back of my hand. You all sat next to me and Werran shot daggers at me.

Death: What made me so interested in you was that you were the first person that wanted to include us in anything. You were willing to have us sit next to you guys at lunch. You were willing to introduce us to the rest of your family, even though they weren't here. You were willing to introduce us to your friends and classmates. You were kind to us. You were kind to me. And I found that to be something beautiful.

Me: Let me put this all together. So you had a less than ideal life, joined the Horsemen to prevent catastrophes such as yours from happening to others, end up being rejected and unwanted by other people and your team members, but ended up really liking me because I was the only person who was able to take the time to get to know you as a human being rather than some strange monster.

With that understanding, she hugs my chest, tears flowing like a water fountain. It felt strange, having a couple inches of human flesh be the difference between Death and my life. But I comforted her, at last knowing what her story was and why she felt the way she did. We sat there for 10 minutes, with her head moving up towards my shoulders. We hugged, with me sheepishly comforting her in spite of all that happened. After 3 more minutes, she spoke.

Death: This came out all at once, but you know the reason for my look now. The last thing I want to happen is for the team to splinter again and lose more friends. Because you included us in your activities and study sessions, you guys were my first friends, you know? It made me overjoyed to hang out with you and help you on this mission.

She sniffles and tears up again. I quickly wipe away the tears from her face. She emits a small hopeful smile.

Death: So please, talk with the rest of them, and keep everyone together. I don't want to lose any of you, especially you.

She smiles at me once again, and walks outside to talk to Werran. I walk inside and stop right at the fridge, pondering who to talk to next.

Meanwhile outside, War is talking to Death about the conversation she just had. His superhuman hearing stopped him from continuing to punch trees with his bare hands. He had walked outside the door and was going to enter when he heard the conversation start. He respectfully listened on the porch, and then got up when Death walked outside.

Death: So now you know too. I was honestly expecting you to "accidentally" barge in on us.

War: Look "Thannat," I may be blunt, but I am not rude under any circumstances. I am not that heartless to interrupt the conversation you were having with Pipsqueak lover boy over there. To be honest, I think you two would make a great couple.

Death: No no no no, I don't see him as that. We're only friends. I just appreciate that he cares about me…

War: Sure, sure. Tell yourself what you need to help yourself sleep at night. Come on, let's go inside and listen to Pip talk to the others.


	8. Chapter 7: Conquest's fatal error

_Setting: Right after my conversation with Death. I will now choose who to talk to out of Famine and Conquest._

I honestly don't know who to start with. Both of them seem like they could use someone to talk to. Even if Conquest doesn't want to talk about his past, and even if Famine isn't in the mood to straight up talk to anyone, I have to at least let them know that there's someone they can trust, at least one person.

Death flashback: "So please, talk with the rest of them, and keep everyone together. I don't want to lose any of you, especially you."

You're goddamn right. I don't know what sort of missions these guys have been on before, or what sort of shit they've encountered, but this event must've been some very scary shit to shake the confidence of Conquest and Famine. I have to find a way to get their confidence up and work out whatever weaknesses they can work out.

I've decided to tackle the problem separately. I'll go to Conquest first, and then talk to Famine. Of course, both of them may have some lingering thoughts towards each other, so I must take care not to make either of them too angry again.

I walk into the Dining room and take a seat to the left of Conquest. In order for him to feel a little more reassured I put myself in a position where he could talk to me directly rather than skirt the issue by looking away.

Me: I'm going to be direct with you. Conquest, I want to learn about your past. More importantly, the past that made our failed escape bring up bad memories for you. If you wish to tell me, or wish to keep it to yourself, that's completely fine. But know this, your problem has a higher chance of being confronted and worked out with if you decide to talk to others about it. So what's it going to be, Khan?

A long 25 seconds pass, with me staring at him, and him averting my gaze. His body twitched, beads of sweat started to form on his head, and he rubbed his arms without stopping. His face was anguished, as if he were fighting a mental war with some being inside his head. Then, he spoke.

Conquest: Okay. I'll tell you what made me so broken and angry at the end of that escape. I'm going to be frank; you'll learn quite a bit about me that you may not want to here. There's about a 63% chance you will feel depressed after hear –

Me: Fuck the 63%. Probability doesn't matter now. What matters is my friend is in a funk and I'm unable to fix it. It feels infuriating to sit here helplessly as a depowered Agnum not being able to help. I know you will do anything to help me, so let me help you confront your problems so we can look towards fixing them.

Conquest: Thanks for that. I wanted a final assurance of this kind of loyalty. Thank you for this.

He smiled, and then slowly frowned. I could feel I was about to dive into something gut-wrenching and dark. Oh boy.

Conquest: You know what my background was? Actually, a better question would be why me and Conquest are always seen arguing.

Conquest: We're both fundamentally different, and have very opposite experiences. You'll have to ask him what his experience was.

Conquest: When I was 15, I became a soldier. I was a knight, specifically. I was a knight that no one cared about, one that no one would've noticed. My parents didn't care. They hated me from the moment I was born. They said, go out and do whatever the fuck you want you dumbass. We know you're going to get yourself or somebody else killed. I should've listened to that and became a farmer or something mundane.

Conquest: Unfortunately, I was not born to do something mundane. I volunteered to join the army, and they took note of my natural talent for combat. I was trained to be a knight and ordered to be a part of a skirmishing party. One day, our superiors got intelligence that convinced them to attack an enemy camp. Our skirmishing party was the closest. I had this gut feeling that something bad was going to happen, and yet orders were orders, and I had to follow them all the way through. We rode into the camp and started fighting the enemy. I killed 4 soldiers that were attacking the leader of my skirmishing party. Our group killed so many soldiers that day. Our 35 took their 25 soldiers by surprise and massacred them. We killed many women and children in the camp too. "Under Orders from his majesty, they said."

At this point, a pained laugh starts to come out of him. I could feel a decade of hurt start to emanate from his pained face. This was a man that was forced into his misdeeds.

Conquest: You know what's the WORST PART? (At this point, he's laughing hysterically. I could feel him about to explode) We were given faulty and correct information. Those people we slaughtered and butchered were part of a faction that was allied to us. As part of our duty, we were supposed to be protecting them while they gave us material tribute. But I'm guessing my superiors wanted the stench of Archian blood off of their hands, so they ordered my group to report this as an enemy camp wiped out. They wanted supplies for themselves immediately instead of "poor" tribute, so they were willing to attack their own allies to do so. And our group went along like a flock of sheep falling off a cliff. **FAULTY, FAULTY, FAULTY!**

Conquest: For saving the leader of my party, I was given a promotion. In fact, for leading the charge and protecting my leader until the other members of my group arrived, I was given a promotion past my leader. What would you know? I would get the thing I always wanted in exchange for committing irredeemable crimes against humanity. A promotion TO GENERAL! I got a promotion to fucking general for killing all those people and saving my company leader.

Conquest: Many members of my group, upon hearing of the information committed suicide. Some hung themselves, some killed themselves on the spot, and some signed up for suicide missions. I had some things to do. As general, with my leeway and power, I was able to find out the identities of the 4 innocent men I killed, Zylam, Yan, Edgarth, and Brin. They all had futures similar to mine, aspirations of greatness and dreams of elevating their miserable lives. And I killed them all, because a couple of corrupt pieces of shits were too impatient to wait on a couple more supplies.

Conquest: Those corrupt men got away with it. They ran the state, so what could I do but follow my orders?

Conquest: I gave tribute to the families of the men I killed, and the men and women that were slain that day, but nothing could wipe away the guilt that continued to cloud my mind. After 10 years of service, I had enough and tried to stab myself in my tent. I had my letter of resignation already written and all the arrangements towards the family members of the victims getting restitution were ready. A knife would do the trick, especially against one without a cloth. Then he appeared; the Gatekeeper walked out of a white-goldish portal. He spoke to me, asking if my time was really up. He said that I could do more with the skills I had. So, he gave me an offer. Join the Horsemen and prevent situations like mine from happening again. No more corrupt men with agendas of their own. No more faulty intelligence to be gained. I was going to do things with clear, concise information to limit the casualties of battle and prevent mistakes like these from occurring again.

Conquest: Then, we met DeGiorno on this street. I knew exactly which routes to take to avoid this dangerous enemy. Every single route we took should've been able to avoid him. Even with all of our abilities: Famine's smell, my escape plan, Death's cloaking, and War's sight, we were unable to dodge that fucker because I missed one obvious detail that shouldn't have added up. That fucking tiny tracker on Death was so damn obvious, I should've picked that up instantly. Even if War couldn't see it, I should've seen it. A miniscule crease on her shoulders was indented in a way that should've made it obvious. But I didn't take note of it. It probably happened as she was taking off her paintball gear or when she walked outside to rejoin us. It pissed me the fuck off to just be outsmarted like that and have my plans fail me like that. It brought me back to that fateful day, where I killed all those innocent people because of information outside of my control. So now that everything I could perceive was in my control, AND I STILL FAILED, what does that say about my abilities? What does that say about me as a Horseman? I failed you, Agnum, and I should be treated as such.

Me: No. You don't deserve to be treated as a failure just because you fucked up. I have to ask this question before I continue with what I want to say. Is this the first mission for the 3 of you?

Conquest: Yes. We had training rounds where we assisted on some veterans who were currently Horsemen. This was the first mission the 3 of us took with Death.

Me: Then that's all I need to tell you this. I can't say that this is a failure this early in the mission, nor can I say that your abilities have failed me. As a result of your experiences, you wanted to avoid situations where your information and your strategies failed you in a way that could put the rest of us in danger or make us do something heinous. This encounter triggered some very unpleasant memories, because it rendered you as helpless as the moment when you were ordered to slaughter those people. I could tell you that you didn't do terrible. I could say to do better next time. I could say that the enemy was stronger than us and that we need to refocus. (I did say that. That's another reason why he got so upset.) None of those statements is going to solve the issue that is plaguing you along with the other Horsemen. In order to truly overcome the issues each of you have, we'll have talk about our problems with each other and evaluate how we can work together to solve each of them. I just wanted to give you my assurance that you aren't alone. I will help you along the way and support you. The other Horsemen will help you solve your issues, as you should help them resolve theirs as well. Whatever pasts we have, whatever despicable things we may have done, they will be confronted and dealt with together. The past does not define who you are as a person. However, we can make sure that we'll be able to help you come to terms with the past.

Conquest shaking my hand: Thank you. Thank you for listening to me. I'll try my best to help you.

Me: 100% effort.

Conquest: 100% effort.

I got up after shaking his hand and started to walk over to the Living Room. I passed by Death and War listening to the conversation. Death gave me a small smile, and War gave her a little nudge. She punched his arm, and continued to smile at me. I guess she felt better that I was getting a step closer to helping this team work its issues out.

I walked up to Famine's side and sat in the chair next to the couch. I had a feeling that his story was going to be the most tragic of all.


	9. Chapter 8: Famine's punishment

Famine has been staying in the living room for the past 2 and half hours. He's restless, having moved constantly and having sat in every chair. It's been said that the quietest ones are usually the most dangerous, and normally that would be the case. This time though, he's been nervous rather than focused angry. He keeps moving around, as if he's being pestered by an invisible mosquito. If I don't listen to him, he's going to have a fairly bad time.

Me: So Sarvty, how's it going?

Famine: What do you think Pip? It's going quite fine. I just, I can't really shake the feeling that something's wrong with the room. There are too few chairs here. In case your parents come back, we're going to have a problem with seating arrangements. I'm freaking out man…

Nervously audible is his voice. He fidgets with the chair he's standing in front of, clutching onto it and tightening his grip on it. Oh crap, he might break it.

Me: Easy there Famine, don't break the chair. (I reach over and clutch his arm, gently setting his hands off of them.) Whatever you need, I'll get it for you. Oh, and don't call me Pip. Only War gets to call me Pip. We're the same height, remember?

Famine: A chair. We need another chair. There's 6 here, but we need 7.

Me: Sure. Let's go for a drive, just you and me. We'll take the Volkswagen Golf and leave.

Before we get to the garage, I signaled to Conquest to follow suit. Death and War get to stay at home undetected while we venture out to buy some new furniture. Those chairs of mine were fucking garbage anyways. They fuck up your back. I hate fucking chairs that aren't straight.

A red Volkswagen Golf with a dash cam recorder. Its small size complements the small amount of money my parents are willing to spend on things such as this. Their one motto is that entertainment takes a backseat to hard work. Hard work: Such as finding a job, studying hard for college, and finding someone to spend your life with. I haven't got a job at this point, my studies aren't as good, and I haven't been interested in finding a girlfriend yet. One thing has to happen at a time. I get in the driver's seat while Famine gets in the other front seat. I open the garage door and drive out. Conquest follows suit by jumping across rooftops.

We drive around on the freeway, not able to find a furniture store that suited our needs. However, the problem is not furniture. It does have something to do with it though. Did y'all honestly think we were going to have a furniture buying chapter?

Me: So I'm getting the impression that this furniture is representative of something you don't want to see. I'm getting the feeling you're projecting some past memory in the form of my shitty chairs. I understand that you're not the one to talk about your problems as quickly as you would want, so I took this car trip to get the time for me to know you.

Famine: Bingo. I'm guessing you could say those chairs are representative of some of my habits.

Me: What habits, exactly?

Famine: My eating habits.

Famine: Pip, have you ever done something so irrevocably shitty, so absolutely vile that you wanted to kill yourself afterwards to wipe the shame away? And have you ever wished you wanted to go back in time to do the situation over again?

Me: First, I said don't call me Pip. Second, yes. I have done a fair share of irrevocably shitty things. I've made my parents worry with the many lazy and irresponsible things I've done. I've lived my life hopelessly mediocre, drifting from passion to passion as if nothing could interest me. Nothing did interest me. It's just like, I couldn't really understand if there was anything that I could hold onto. I'm doing a real bad job of explaining this, and this seems really fucking unclear. To put it simply, I haven't found a real passion for something or something I really like, and I put up a front for myself to make it seem like I've got everything going good for myself. I've had many situations where I wanted to go back in time to fix it. I hated myself sometimes; hell, I even tried to kill myself with a butcher knife, I thought I was that damn worthless. But here I am, still living, still trying to find that purpose.

Famine: I see. Then I'm guessing you don't want to hear –

Me: Don't you fucking dare, Famine. I'm here to talk to you about the meaning of these chairs. We're going to keep driving until I solve that mystery. What do these chairs mean, Famine?

Famine: So you really want to know? Good.

At this point, we've driven around for a good half hour. We bought some new straight chairs and started to drive back home. I already called off Conquest as he said there was no chance of attack.

Famine: The irrevocably shitty thing I've done was that I was an incredibly selfish shit. Even more so than you think, more than what you've done. You talk about being lazy in school, not being able to find a part-time job yet. I'm not one-upping you when I say this, but I've committed an unspeakable sin. I killed my kingdom.

Me: OH SHIT!

I was so distracted from hearing him say the last part that I almost lose control of the car. It ends up spinning in circles and goes flying into the wilderness. I mentally yelled oh shit as well, which Famine took as a command to wither the trees we were about to spin into. After having a near-death experience, we got back to driving on the road. Out of the stories told today, Famine's was definitely the most shocking.

Me: See that? That's me right there; undependable and not very controlling.

Famine: It's fine. As I was saying, I killed my kingdom in a despicable manner. You see, my current eating habits originate from some eating habits I've had since I was a prince in the kingdom of Zanara. I was a gluttonous fuck, always eating away and picking whatever I wanted to eat. Everyone willingly gave me food, and I was ignorant. I was ignorant of the fact that it was during a season where there was a famine. All crops were dying, and the king ordered most of the food to be given to the royal family. There was nothing I could do. I could "talk" to my father, but he would not budge. Something about me being the "successor" and having to eat in order to survive and carry on the royal blood of the family. My mother had already died giving birth to me and I was the only heir, so I had no real power, no way to prevent people from starving. I was forbidden to give out any food, as at the moment of the part where I realized the enormity of the situation, I just received almost all of their supplies.

Famine: So I watched. I watched, and watched, and watched, and watched. I've killed so many people that day.

Me: There wasn't –

Famine: **THERE WAS SO MUCH I COULD'VE DONE! I SHOULD'VE STOOD UP TO MY FATHER; I SHOULD'VE FOUGHT FOR MY SUBJECTS!** Instead, I stood by as he maintained the order and allowed most of his people to starve to death.

Famine: You know how bad it got?

Me: How?

Famine: When I was visiting a farm next to the castle, I spotted a familiar subject. This was one that had cursed me out from the beginning of the ruling to a couple of days ago. I wondered what had happened to him. Then I saw the baby.

Famine: A baby so malnourished that it could bring a baby serial killer to tears. Skinny enough I could see its ribcage. Skinny face, skinny arms and legs, skinny chest, and it didn't have enough energy to cry. Think about that; not enough energy to even cry out in pain. All it can do is suffocating on its own suffering. It's an endless wall of torture pushing inwards until death. And I couldn't do shit. Not allowed to bring food outside the walls, as I get patted down in every single area just to see. (Yes, even the ones where you could get away with hiding food) I get observed by guards on every encounter outside the walls.

Famine: I held that baby's hands Pip. I held its almost lifeless hands in mine and faced the sins of my punishment. For being a selfish, cowardly piece of shit, I have to live with the sins of what I had done; for not standing up for these people, for not standing up to my father, for not taking matters into my own hands.

Me: Oh my god. No person should ever have to suffer through this, especially not a 12 year old kid.

Famine: I deserve it. For not being able to save these people I deserve to face these sins.

Famine: 3 years passed from that day. My father died peacefully in his sleep, the old piece of shit bastard. I was getting ready to hang myself with some rope I got from the stable. And the Gatekeeper showed up. He presented me the offer of being the Horseman Famine. Quite fitting, isn't it?

Famine: You know why I chose this role?

Me: To right your wrongs and make sure this doesn't happen to anyone else?

Famine: No. To be forever confronted by my sins as punishment for my inaction. It kills me to see the habits I still have left over. I have this predilection you've seen to want to eat many things; just another reminder of what I've fucking done. I take this role to punish myself for what I've done, and am constantly reminded of what I've done before by my habits: it drives me insane. The only thing that keeps my sanity together is the fact that I use this role as a Horseman to help others. That's why I can't stand it when Conquest talks about logistics. You're not going to care about logistics when your people are starving. I can't stand being forced to live while I see others dying of preventable causes.

Famine: The chairs were a way of projecting my problems outside of my mind. See, if I don't do that every once in a while, I'll go insane. You could say I got overly concerned we wouldn't have enough chairs, and would've gone crazy if we hadn't gotten new ones. I can't stand not having enough to help my friends.

For the first time, I have nothing to say. It's very grim, taking a role of the 4th Horseman as a way to inflict suffering on yourself, and constantly driving yourself insane by being reminded of the habits of your past. We drive back home in silence, with me being unable to comprehend how to start working towards answering this problem.

We say nothing further as we close the garage door and walk inside. Famine walks past the trio, sitting down in his normal chair to stare at the wall. Death casts a questioning look, and I shake my head at her. _No success._ It's going to take a lot more than a talk and a couple of self-help therapy to help Sarvty's state of being. He's perfectly normal on the outside. You wouldn't be able to tell he had this kind of past. But inside is a depressed kid inflicting self-punishment onto him as a way to atone for past sins. We'll have to help each other as a group.

War is the final Horseman to talk to. Something tells me that we'll need to do this tomorrow. I was going to take him out for some target practice in the backyard, but it's already 8 pm. I tell the rest of the Horsemen to go to sleep as I go upstairs and lie down in my bed.

Do robots dream of electric sheep? No; 4 Horsemen dream of their past and try to undergo these roles to help themselves or punish themselves. I dreamt of my uncertain and scary future, unable to see how I was going to solve my current problems.


	10. Chapter 9: A tale of War and Conquest

An alarm clock rang, signaling the time to be 6:30. Good, we've got at least 2 hours before we have to get to the academy. It's as good of a time as any to have a talk with War.

He was up for 10 minutes before me, having been told the previous night that I was going to take him somewhere. Yes, the place I was taking him to was the gun range at the school.

The businessman really wanted to help us with our studies, and thanks to the grace of the Gatekeeper, he was able to get us special permission to use the gun range that was normally reserved for teachers. Of course, since our boss man was so kind to us, we didn't have to go through the trouble of scrounging up the money to get identification codes. No wonder these guys love him.

We take a walk down to the academy. I never said how close it was; it was a 1 mile walk to get there. It sucks for anyone who lives miles away, but the 5 of us can just get there without breaking a sweat.

War and I walk up to the security gate and show our identification codes, then walk into the academy to put our stuff in early. The rest of them got to sleep in today, those lucky bastards. But, this talk is necessary, and it must be done before we've got any further problems.

We walk past the second security guard into the gun range. We pick up our guns from a list assigned by us from the third security guard. Of course, the guns have safeties on to prevent us from immediately trying to kill each other. However, it also has a heartbeat monitor connected to a computer; that activates a mechanism in the gun that shuts it off in case anyone gets any funny ideas. How the fuck is this businessman able to afford this kind of shit. I know he's an oil tycoon, and (very big fucking contradiction here) invests in renewable energy sources as well, but no one should be able to afford this kind of shit. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he shits out money and wipes his ass with 20s.

We start to take the half mile walk into the gun range to start shooting when our conversation began.

War: So Pipsqueak, wanna tell me why you brought me out here?

Me: I've had a talk individually with the other Horsemen, so I'm thinking that I wanted to have a talk with you. To be direct, I've had different methods to get these guys to open up. This was my method, something we could both do together.

War: Have you ever held a gun Pipsqueak?

Me: No, but I'll learn.

War: Good god, Pipsqueak. I might have to teach you how to not kill yourself.

We stop along the way, with him teaching me the proper stance and positioning, while he starts to open up about himself.

War: You wanted to know? Fine, this is my story. (So cliché it hurts. I'm sorry for anyone that has to read that cringey ass line.)

War: Do you know why I became War? Or more so, why I was forced into it? It's fairly simple, actually. My village was killed because of a peace agreement with another group.

War: It's quite funny actually; we should've seen it coming. The deal was simple; give us your supplies slowly, and we'll give you protection. I saw the eyes of the general that made the deal. He obviously wasn't satisfied. I could tell he wanted to get more shit, but ended up having to settle for that little.

War: I tried to warn my fellow villagers of the catastrophe that I knew would inevitably happen, but they all scorned me. "Oh, but Werran they decided to sign it on paper, there's no way they'd try to butcher us. They need our supplies." It doesn't matter if they can just take our supplies by force.

War: So, they rolled in. A raiding company of 40 something men. There were 4 of my friends who tried to attack their general. Zylam, Yan, Edgarth, and Brin, they were the only people who believed me. They were killed by Khan. (Oh, ballsfuckity shit damn cuntfacing motherdicking douchefucky ballscunt. This is going to be even harder than I thought.) _He turns to me. Oh crap, how am I going to resolve something this fucking complicated?_

War: I swore revenge that day. I wanted to kill that motherfucking Khan for a very long time. I enlisted in the army and carved my way through people. I went on suicide missions, and came out alive every time. I hid under the bodies of my family as the swords of those bastards cut through their bodies to check for anyone alive. I wanted to kill that fucker so bad.

War: The Gatekeeper offered me a chance on my final battle. I was about to die to a cavalry charge that surely would've killed me if the Gatekeeper hadn't stopped time. Of course, I'm guessing he had a thing for theatrics. I heard a Za Warudo sound effect and a giant ass portal pop out of the air as he extended his hand to me. He wanted to give me a chance at life and a role in order to satiate my anger.

War: I held my anger in that day. I swore up and down I would find this fucker and kill him. Hell, I was going to kill Khan that day when we failed to locate that DeGiorno bastard. Then, me and Death eavesdropped on your conversation with Conquest.

War: Not only did he hold the memories of those he killed for his whole life, but he honored those memories by making sure their families were well-supplied for the rest of their lives. I instantly lost my urge to kill, as I could see he deeply regretted his actions and sought to atone for them. There was no selfishness there, as he was definitely thoughtful of this.

War: Therefore, I lost my urge for revenge. I'll still remember the people killed that day, but I'll honor their memories by making things right. The first step has to be to get along with Khan, and resolve the pains of our past.

Thank fucking god I don't have to resolve a revenge plotline between two team members. Not only would I need a Deus Ex Machina to fix that problem, but I would not be able to do it AT ALL. That is outside my purview of me as a self-appointed people's person, and I would literally be the first casualty in the inevitable shitstorm that would blow up the town.

We've had some silence afterwards. War taught me proper positioning to hold a gun. We spend half an hour in there, then leave. 7:30, we really spent half an hour talking about War's past and his connection with Conquest.

Security Guard: Sir, before you leave, the Businessman has a gift for you.

Oh god, this is the kind of shit that would turn me into an overpowered Kirito like self-insert bland-ass douchebag. I do not want to accept gifts all willy-nilly like some overpowered character. Okay, maybe just this one and no one will think otherwise (hopefully).

Me: What's it for, sir?

Security Guard: For your own protection. Here, you can choose from the guns on the wall which one you want to carry with you.

How many weapons does this Businessman have? Even with a sizable donation by the Gatekeeper, he shouldn't be able to afford all these weapons. How rich is this fucker? This has to be the Gatekeeper's doing, this weapon gift selection. Oh, and in case you're wondering why I know the gun names, they have an projector screen catalog with names and pictures.

Me: So many to choose from. I don't know which to pick.

Security Guard: You are allowed one handgun and one assault rifle.

Now people will really start thinking I'm some overpowered character. Please stop doing Businessman, you're going to make me into Kirito, and I fucking hate that guy. I'm Guts for life, woot woot.

Me: I'll choose a Sig Sauer PP26 with a silencer and an AR-15 with the full custom attachments on it.

Security Guard: Hey big guy, teach him how to use these weapons. Don't want to cause too much property damage if you don't.

Me: We wave goodbye and promise to take care of them, with me nervous I might fuck up gun handling. Oh crap, this is going to be a hard one to do. Now how do I get Conquest and War to talk to each other and gain a more healthier understanding of each other?


	11. Chapter 10: Conquest vs Famine

So where was I? Right, you guys are probably wondering what happened to us now that I had a talk with the other Horsemen. Funny thing is, we haven't really had that talk yet with everyone. We all had this mutual understanding that we would have to save this for later, so everyone decided to stick to training, which we've neglected on. Of course, I'd have to give the order to train. I've just had so much homework in each of my classes that I wanted to nail my head to a wall and cry. Conquest wouldn't let me have any of that.

Conquest: Okay, one round of training Pip, then we have to finish your studying for Statistics.

Me: One round? Come one, can't we go for more? I want to figure out how best to group you guys into team attacks and shit.

Death: Come on Pipsqueak (I'm taller than you), you're just saying that to get out of your studying. The only reason why you want to keep going is because you want to skip out on your homework.

Me teasingly: Maybe I should be taught by Death instead of you Khan, she appears to get my attention better. (A comical amount of steam erupts from his ears)

Conquest: **HOW DARE YOU INSINUATE SUCH A THING? THAT ME, A STRATEGIC MASTERMIND AND GENIOUS CAN'T TEACH YOU BETTER THAN A GIRL WHO IS OBJECTIVELY NOT AS SMART AS ME?**

They start arguing over who should tutor me for about a minute before I concede that I'll study more if Conquest and Famine could get a sparring match in. So, it was decided.

Me: Conquest will fight Famine. **By the order of my role as the Agnum, I have removed Restriction Power Seal 10 on your abilities. Conquest and Famine fight until you have exhausted your powers. Do not trespass on anywhere that isn't the road. Any violation of these rules will result in the immediate relinquishment of your powers until a later time as punishment for violating the act of Power Restriction Seal 10. Do I make myself undeniably clear?**

Conquest and Famine: Yes, your magnificence. Your directive is our command.

And, they transform. Conquest gains the giant broadsword I caught a glimpse of when they were arguing. He gains a Knight's armor with complete plating, yet I feel it was aerodynamically designed by the Gatekeeper to move fast as shit. A contradiction, as a slow ass weapon and a fast motherfucker can't possibly mix, unless of course, the user is fast.

Famine gains a hood and turns into a skeletal being. He stares at Famine with an empty skeletal head, devoid of eyes and any emotion. He pulls out his battle-axe spear combination and twirls it before setting it in a spearman's stance. He wears a hood, and has nothing but bones underneath. Again, I reckon that whacking at the bones isn't going to hurt him at all. This makes me think he can only be killed by spirit hurting weapons.

They charge each other, with Conquest slashing like a hurricane and Famine parrying to keep up. He deflects and explodes the tip of his axe-spear (I really don't know the technical term for that) to successfully dodge each of his hits.

Conquest is ruthless, but methodical. None of his movements are wasted, and every bit of his energy is designed to finding a weakness inside Famine's defense.

Famine goes on the offensive, separating himself from Conquest with a slash. He goes for a lunge, which Famine dodges easily. What he doesn't expect are two kicks flying at him. Conquest deflects the first kick to his head with his arm. However, Famine uses this as a decoy kick, spinning counterclockwise to clock (hehe… clock) him with a kick to the left side of his face. I should probably mention that Famine is really fucking good at combining decoys into his attacks. He's developed a very complex fighting style consisting of attack moves with hidden decoy moves disguised as real moves.

They go hours and hours of fighting, longer than Death and War. Conquest's defense is too strong for Famine's offense to penetrate. And Conquest isn't strong enough to break Famine's heavy blocks. Death and I started up a conversation about the guns I've got, with War joining in occasionally and adding pointers about how to use them properly.

Me: It's getting quite dark again. **Conquest, Famine, relinquish your powers. Restriction Power Seal 10 has been implemented once more and no further fighting is to be done on my behalf.**

Conquest and Famine: Yes, your magnificence.

Me: Okay, I'll speed this up. Famine, you have to work on your defense. You focus too much on offense and leave yourself with only the option of deflecting and blocking. Conquest, for a guy who's very smart, you're not as creative of a fighter as I would've asked. For some extra moves, I require you to read the manga call Berserk and start to work on some of your move sets. I can't just have you swinging your damn broadsword in the same predictable movements.

War: Yeah, well we know which of us wants your broadsword, Pipsqueak.

Death proceeds to punch War in the face, while furiously maintaining that she thinks no such thing. I pat her on the shoulder, which only increases the teasing of War. She slaps his arm, with him running away from her around the house.

Me: HEY, DON'T BREAK ANYTHING. What a pain in my ass.

We walk inside and take a break for the day, thinking that we've exhausted ourselves quite enough. I think after some studying, we're going to have that meeting we should've had. War and Conquest have to come to gain a complete understanding of their situation, Conquest and Famine have to get along, and Death has to be reassured she has friends. But, I have to go for studying first, as I have to get through some tests before I can get through these guys.


	12. Chapter 11: Gravedusters: Enemies of us

You know what the hard part about studying is, for me? The hardest part ends up being getting the will to continue on without being distracted by some other shit that's less boring. Unfortunately, this is also compounded by the fact that I have the Horsemen to take care of and hope they don't go wrecking the house while I'm gone for half a second. Good thing they live with me inside of a house I can manage them in, and it's a good thing we're currently studying with each other as well.

Conquest: So you seriously don't get Statistics? It's 100% easy if you gave a shit and decided to actually put some effort into it. If we're starting with the basics by definition, experimental research has the opportunity to draw direct cause and effect conclusions. And there's also post-facto research, which can't prove cause and effect. Following me here? With your attitude currently, there's a 63% chance you may fail the next exam.

Me: I'm following, I'm following. So experimental research can draw conclusions on cause and effect while post-facto research is different and can't do the same.

Conquest: And as you should know, there are quasi and true experiment types for the experimental research. Of course, true experiments are better at providing a connection to causation than quasi experiments, while quasi experiments are better than post-facto research. Therefore, whatever research you might have, you have to take it with a grain of salt.

I'm just going to skip a bunch because having Conquest talk about statistics while I'm trying to get something going here is REALLY going to piss some of you off into wanting to kill me. Of course, I have to suffer through this, but you guys can jump straight to the end.

Conquest: … So in conclusion, Statistics is 50% reading comprehension, and 50% word problems. We'll help you for this.

At this point, I've tuned out the end of the conversation and almost fell asleep. I almost fell down until I noticed War slumped over on the ground snoring. Famine is leaning against the wall, sleeping while standing. And for some reason, I just felt the feeling of Death sleeping against my right shoulder. Great, now I have to stop him before I get stuck standing upright forever.

Me: Okay, I think I studied enough for today. Conquest, let's go for some tactical retraining.

This makes the group shoot up. Unfortunately, the force of Death shooting up ends up hitting my nose, giving me a nosebleed.

Me: Great. No no, it's fine Death. I can get some cotton balls myself.

I shove some in my ears and find the group looking at me, perhaps eager that I throw a bone to them, or perhaps more eager that they can teach me some things. I do need the most training out of the group after all.

Me: So, I was thinking that we can do group combinations and think of some names for them.

We should've done that a while ago, but I had studying, paintball practice, Long Knife asshole, the Horsemen's pasts, and all sorts of in between bullshit. Oh yeah, and I had to help these guys adjust to the Academy so they didn't try anything that made them stand out as anything extraordinary. No time was available.

Me: I was thinking Death and War could be … Annihilation, War and Conquest could be … Onslaught, Conquest and Famine could be … Total War, Death and Conquest could be … Absolute Victory, Death and Famine could be Despair, and War and Famine would be March of Hell.

War: That's a lot of names, and you are not thinking of good ones.

Me: Well, that's what we're going to stick with until you guys find a better combination. And how about this: you've already seen how that DeGiorno bastard got past us?

Famine: Yeah, what's your point?

Me: What other powers have you got?

Famine: Let's see, I've got another one that enables me to detect exactly where one is by allowing roots in the ground to sense out the heartbeat of the person. Unfortunately, DeGiorno didn't have a heartbeat on his clones. So, how would we beat him? Wait, could you use your powers in conjunction with War and spot your targets better? You would have to use Death to carry you up in the sky while cloaking the both of you. You could use your eyesight to see your targets.

Conquest: But how would we get Death to – NO! You wouldn't!

Me: Yes, in order to use that type of combination, I would have to restrict War's powers while lifting Restriction Power Seal 9, enabling Death to carry even more weight.

War: Pipsqueak, leaving some Horsemen depowered is extremely dangerous and can lead to some unwanted consequences.

Death: I agree with War. Pipsqueak, you can't do this. This is dangerous for us. (Good god, she's giving me that stare that screams don't do that. It is her most dangerous power as she is not only very cute, but very attractive when she does that. Must… resist… urge… to refuse… plan)

Me: Couldn't we have Conquest guard you guys by watching out with his spear? Since his ammunition is unlimited since he can regenerate axe/spears after destroying them, he can keep guard and destroy and projectiles that try to harm you guys.

Death: Fine, we can try this. But don't say I didn't warn you if the strategy doesn't work.

She smiles at me and waves goodnight as she takes the room next to me. Famine decides to move into the bedroom across from me. The parents' bedroom is off limits though, as I don't want them to fuck it up too badly.

The next morning (this is 2 days after the talk with War), we all head to school at 8:30. Since we live close, we arrive there fairly quickly and get to homeroom in time for it to start. We took our normal seats and await the beginning of class, but we get a surprise.

Teacher: Hello homeroom, we have a new student today, actually 4 new students. Say hi to Shaunnad, Karsnip, Jaundice, and Alistair.

I don't take mind of them, but Sarvty instantly starts to fidget. Conquest visibly starts shaking, War angrily glares, and Death looks at me with a mixture of "protect us" and "save me."

Me thinking: Death, who are these guys?

Death thinking: These are the infamous Gravedusters. They are our sworn enemies and part of the Organization called the High Priests of Samael. These guys are the antithesis of what we stand for as people and will try any means to destroy us. Please Pip, be very careful around them. They should have their own person to activate them.

They walk by my desk and each of them give me a glare. The second one gives me a light tap on the shoulder, and I glare back with malice.

Karsnip to unknown: This guy ain't scared easy. I look forward to breaking him, to pieces.

By now the teacher has left the homeroom and we get some alone time for half an hour. By now, I could make out the identity of their activator.

Aaron: I always knew you were weird Andrew, but I didn't realize you were the Agnum to my Activator. I am going to look forward to besting you, and after I'm done with you I'm going to find the Rainfall Testament and kill this Trigger person. Just you wait Andrew, I'm going to enjoy breaking you to pieces and putting you back together; except, there won't be much left of you when I complete your puzzle.

I could feel something in my bones shake violently with anger. No, this was worse. For the first time in my life, my mind was completely clouded by an animalistic urge to stab Aaron to death with the pencil across from me. Death grabbed my hand, and pleaded with her eyes to not take any rash actions. So instead of attacking, I simmered in anger. Aaron and I were friends since the beginning; hell, we were supposed to be the best possible friends. Not only did we do everything together, but he even helped stand up for me against some bullies. Was he always a part of these High Priests? Why does he want to kill me? Why would he never tell me about this kind of activity? I always knew his dad's job was a strange one, but I could never have imagined it would be in a cult of super humans designed to kill the Horsemen. I have to find out why he turned out this way and stop him from going through with his plans.

Conquest thinking: This must be their latest incarnation. Every Horseman has a Graveduster designed to kill their Horsemen with that specific power. Every time one bests the other, the victorious one must automatically retire as the victor. The score is roughly 51% to 49% in their favor. The odds don't look good so far.

Death thinking: Shaunnad you bitch. I've had to watch you torture my sister in front of me while I was imprisoned before my execution. You were the one that sent her off. I'm going to eviscerate you.

War thinking: That piece of shit. He's a part of the fuckers that killed stabbed my family over and over. That psychopath, I'll kill that piece of shit Karsnip.

Conquest thinking: I have to kill Karsnip before War gets too angry and fucks up against him. As for Jaundice my immortal foe, even in death we still waged wars against each other on opposite sides of the battlefield. Me, methodical yet caring for my soldiers. You piece of shit with fake compassion and an absolute willingness to sacrifice everyone to meet your goals, I must finally vanquish you.

Famine thinking: You bullying piece of shit, captain of the guard that enjoyed punishing and manhandling anyone that even tried to feed themselves. If there is one person I hate more than my father, it's you who actively and sadistically inflicted torture on the citizens while making me watch as some part of sick humor.

Aaron laughed that laugh I now find absolutely appalling. That annoying hyena laugh caused attention towards him. How dare that piece of shit call me my friend while lying to me about why he hung out with me? He probably knew I was the Agnum all along, and his statement was just for show to fuck with my head. This school year just got much harder.

Me, Death, War, Conquest, and Famine thinking (I'm the one talking here): Okay guys, we're going to talk during lunch, but I'll start this conversation here. We're going to…


	13. Chapter 12: Death and I begin to date

One thing I may have forgotten to mention; the Horsemen and I are our most advantageous when we aren't around anyone and can use our powers freely without harming people. Unfortunately, Aaron and those (I can already tell they're all assholes) Gravedusters have made it especially sure that we are not going to be fighting them on an even playing field. The Horsemen do not play with the lives of innocents, but it seems like these people would rather kill us brutally and publically than discretely, with or without killing hundreds of innocent people along the way.

Oh, and you just figured out my name last chapter, huh? Andrew: that was my name that I was going to reveal when something special or significant was going to happen. Aaron, however, sought to spoil the surprise. Fuck him. He thinks he can underestimate us? Give us some time, and I have some tricks up my sleeve for them. But first, we must not be afraid to get our hands dirty playing innocent; at least, in the eyes of bystanders.

The classes were predictable, except with the Gravedusters sitting behind us and trying to harass us by throwing an assortment of shit (pens, pencils, erasers, spitballs, hell even nail clippings) at us. They take great fun in provoking us, knowing that if we draw attention to ourselves, the Viceroy can get a little suspicious. Then it will be over, as the Businessman and the Viceroy are not necessarily type of supporters. Any trouble we bring will cause the Viceroy to throw us out, whatever it may be.

You're probably thinking that Famine could've used his dead vine ability to hang these guys upside down by their pants, strip them naked, and drag them around the school and embarrass them. But the Viceroy is not someone I want to piss off, certainly not when I need this schooling, and the Horsemen have all agreed to not do anything to antagonize too severely. Great, basically this is an internment period for us and we're going to have to suffer through it for an indeterminate amount of time before I figure out how to kill them brutally. Sorry, inner psychopathic moment there. I'm going to skin that traitorous bastard.

 _Setting: As of that moment, we're sitting at lunch. Those assholes are sitting a couple tables behind us, laughing about whatever shit they might be planning against us. God, I want to just pull out the Sig Sauer that Death cloaked and just unload into all of them while they're still depowered._

Death thinking: Andrew, please don't fall victim to such violent thoughts. We have to maintain a cool head so we can beat them.

Me: You're right. But I can't shake the feeling that unlike you guys, this guy was my best friend from my childhood. I hate this fucker with all my being.

Death grabs my arm and squeezes tightly. She gives me a look of sternness and caring and begs me not to do anything yet. I could hear those fuckers howl behind me, probably thinking of how they could twist the knife between me and Death.

After lunch, we head to our last class and sit through a boring ass lecture about how relevant Statistics is to our daily lives; all the while being pelted by invisible pencils and erasers. We head to our lockers, quickly group up, and start to walk home as fast as possible. Unfortunately, we couldn't find a route to shake them and they materialized behind us instantly.

Shaunnad: You know, for the current incarnation of Death, you really have done a terrible job at fitting in with people. Not being able to make friends until you came across Andrew here? I bet he must be some kind of boyfriend of yours; perhaps you two are very close? Honestly, if it weren't for the fact we have to kill you, I would probably try going out with him. In fact, I would probably be the dominant one in this relationship. He'd be my bitch, just like your sister. (Death gets REALLY pissed at this)Wouldn't be the first time I'll get to break someone's body while making you watch.

Every fiber in Death's body screamed out a nerve signal of completely pissed off, but I squeeze her arm firmly. Don't respond Death, like you said to me, I'll say the same to you.

Karsnip: For the incarnation of War, you really are just a little pussy. You didn't have the balls to defend your family, so you hid under their while they got stabbed defending you. And you didn't even have the mind to kill Conquest, what a fucking shame. You really are far more dickless than I could ever think of you.

Jaundice: Another one of your pathetic strategies that failed. I'd say we currently have a 55% chance of victory over you, wouldn't you agree "Khan?" Wait, I shouldn't take your word for it considering you've proven to be quite unreliable in ensuring the safety of your friends.

Alistair: How pathetic, a Horseman who may actually be dickless. Never mind War Karsnip, but Sarvty may actually have no balls. Couldn't even stand up to his father, couldn't even stand up to me, and couldn't even protect that baby. You remember, don't you, how I stomped that old man's head in and let that baby burn? I think it proved quite toasty for us guards, and we got to prove once again that the weak cannot afford to survive. Which makes me wonder why you still choose to live? To resolve your sins, I presume? You still can't resolve shit with those habits of yours.

At any other moment, I think I would've removed Restriction Power Seal 5 and let them loose. But we reached our house side door and we walked in. They stand outside the driveway, just next to my mailbox, being that I have grounds to shoot on site as permission was granted by the Businessman. They left, knowing that they pissed us off. But I figured out their strategy; to fuck me up. It's an added bonus that all of them are from the Horsemen's pasts, but they want to fuck up my life. If I get fucked up, the Horsemen lose sight of their goal, and we'll get put on the defensive. Then it'll be over; the Trigger will find the Rainfall Testament, the Gravedusters will kill the Trigger, and they'll be in control to do whatever the fuck they want with the weapon.

Me: I know y'all want to smash everything in the kitchen and create giant holes everywhere, but think about what we discussed during lunch, and what you all just figured out. Now that we know that the goal of the Gravedusters is to fuck up my life in order to find the Trigger and obtain the Rainfall Testament, we have to make sure we don't get isolated from each other.

Conquest: Yes, if we assume correctly that their position is the separation of the Agnum from the Horsemen protecting him, and that they wished to avoid a direct confrontation as Jaundice probably deduced that we had a better chance at winning; we can presume that what they wish for is the separation of the group. They are going to try and break us by isolating us from each other; whether it's socially, academically, or outside of class, there is a roughly 33% chance for each of them happening.

Famine: What about the last 1%?

War: I would assume the last 1% is Conquest being entirely wrong and that they try to attack us while we're sitting at home is that correct? Would it be wrong to postulate that based on their confidence in antagonizing us, it would be entirely possible that they could try killing us at any moment and only fail to do so because they take special interest in torturing us?

Conquest: Yes War, that is very intuitive. War brings up an excellent point. If there is a chance that they already have a plan other than isolating us down the middle, and instead about attacking us while we're at our strongest, we can safely assume that these enemies already have a plan in motion.

Famine: So in the end, we're fucked. We're fucked because they could either divide and conquer or hit us at our strongest, and we have no idea which it's going to be.

At that moment, a very weird and possibly incredibly stupid idea came into my head, something that anyone would find completely out of character and strange. But fuck it; I've had 4 Horsemen come into my life and this entire Christian symbolism crap throw itself at me without the existence of a God. My life didn't make sense then, and it sure as hell won't make sense now. Best do something nonsensical. Wait, that's how we'll win, but I won't share that right now.

Me: I have a proposition. We'll all sleep together in the same room.

Due to the mental connection I have with the rest of the Horsemen, I could instantly feel Death light up with joy. The rest of the Horsemen are ambivalent to this, and go to get some spare sleeping bags from the closet.

The purpose of the dumbfuck strange plan was to make us bond together quicker. See, if you throw a bunch of humans in an arena of death and force them to work together other, they will adapt quickly. Well, the arena is my bedroom and the arena of death is owned by the Gravedusters. My idea is that if we all are uncomfortable as fuck in the same rooms as each other, we'll have to do something to normalize ourselves with each other right? This will force us to talk with each other, open up more about our strengths and weaknesses, and then we can think of better ways to strategize against the Gravedusters.

Famine and Conquest slept on the floor in sleeping bags, while War leaned against the wall, not being able to find a big enough sleeping bag.

Death insisted in sleeping in the same bed as mine. I'm starting to think my idea wasn't necessarily the most thought out one, as I assumed that intimate privacy was an untouchable boundary. Well, it won't be as uncomfortable as my planned trip to see the Gatekeeper tomorrow. I haven't told them yet, as they would likely try to object.

Death: Hey Andrew, thanks for holding me back there. I honestly don't know what I would've done if you hadn't been there to help me. Hell, I don't know what I would do without you. (Look, this line seems fairly cliché, but it's only cliché if you don't know how to explain it. Watch and learn people, I'm about to take this cliché apart.)

Me: And you did great as well. Actually before we fall asleep, I have to ask: I need some further elaboration on the nature of my importance to you. Good god, I know I'm speaking like Conquest here, but I need to know specifically why you find me so important and why you care so much about me.

Death: About time you asked, Andrew. Remember how I told you that I never was able to fit into any group prior to me meeting you?

Me: Yes, I remember.

She looks straight into my eyes, that piercing look of hers seeming as if she's about to shoot heat rays straight to the back of my eye socket.

Death: I'm not going to go into specifics, as that's not the point here. The point is I deeply care about you because you are the first person besides my parents and my sister that cared about me at all. See, my foray was a Horseman was unable to do anything to save my sister. I discovered she was killed by Shaunnad when I left to become a Horseman, secretly killed by hidden dynamite in a boat as she was traveling downriver. All that was left was me and my role as a Horseman.

Death: Then I met you. Before we got to the homeroom, I considered you to be nothing more than a brat that we had to escort and protect. Your grades were certainly reflective of your lack of drive to succeed in life. I give everyone the same customary smile. But something was different about you compared to the other Horsemen and Agnums I interacted with. You were the first person that truly treated me as a person.

Death: Before, I could never truly feel as if I belonged. The Horsemen I encountered laughed at the same jokes, but every time I joined along it would turn towards awkward silence. It takes a toll on a person, being subjected to the same damn thing year after year. It turned me into a machine, just going through the motions of the role until the next batch of Horsemen came, and then it was back to the same old thing again.

Death: But you though, at lunchtime, during class, even at home, you made me feel as if I was human again. You laughed at my jokes, conversed with me equally along with the others, and never failed to include us in activities. Even that stupid arts and crafts competition between homerooms we failed hilariously at.

Me: Yeah I remember that. You tried to create the Eiffel Tower out of toothpicks and ended up collapsing every time we almost got to put the last one on. You were so damn frustrated.

Death: I was and still am. You invited me to join, you know? I never got invited to anything with the rest of the Horsemen or the Agnums. Usually, I asked and they declined, saying I was needed on guard and out of sight. So when you gave me an invitation that you couldn't give less of a shit about, only for the purpose of making sure we didn't feel excluded, I wanted to kiss you out of joy. You took care to ask us and invite us to every event we've had so far. I can't put into words the proper gratitude I need to thank you for this. You made me feel alive again. So, I was thinking I could give something a little more obvious.

Yeah, the other Horsemen aren't oblivious. They sprinted out of the room very quickly. You can all guess what's about to happen.

Death plants a warm and passionate kiss on my lips. Full of gratitude and happiness, she finally did what she must've longed to do in her heart; repay the person that made her feel like a human being again. I could feel years of sorrow and anguish flood out as she gave me the one thanks she could give to me.

The kiss lasted a whole minute, and yet I didn't dare break free to catch my breath. I pulled her closer towards me, and we agreed that we would try our best to help each other defeat what came between us. Not only have I made Death feel alive again, but I may have begun to finally find some determination to make myself feel alive as well. We slept soundly, two flawed people finding solace in the presence of the other.


	14. Chapter 13: Death's reason to live

I woke up to Death's already awake face staring at mine. If we didn't live in the same house as each other, that would be creepy as all hell. She smiled, wishing me good morning, and then got out of bed.

I walked downstairs, trying to think about what to say to the others.

Oh crap, the visit to the Gatekeeper. Since its Saturday we're free for at least a couple of days, and Conquest is under the assumption that we won't get harassed until school starts again on Monday. Well, here goes the question I know they'll yell at me for.

Me thinking: Hey guys? I know War woke up early but could you ask him to tap into my mind as well?

Famine thinking: War, get in here.

War thinking: Yeah okay, what's the problem?

Me thinking (Okay, here goes): I request that one of you take me to visit the Gatekeeper.

Cue yelling noises inside my head that almost made my head explode. Good lord, these guys are vicious when they're impatient.

Me thinking: Okay guys, settle down, settle down. I'll repay you guys, we'll go to Six Flags or some shit.

Death thinking: Oh yay. I always wanted to go to Six Flags…

War thinking: Hahahah, I'm going to win so many prizes.

Conquest thinking: At least we'll get out of the house.

Famine thinking: Food… goddamn it, I can't think like that.

Me thinking: Okay, so it's officially settled. Who's going to take me to see the Gatekeeper?

Death gives me a hug and a smile that could melt an object frozen at subzero temperatures. At that moment, the choice became rather obvious.

War: Death.

Conquest: Death.

Famine: Death.

Death: Me.

Me: So, I'm guessing by your results that you guys feel this is a thing now and that you guys are treating this as if we're going on a date.

Conquest: You are 99% correct.

War: Go do what you want, Pipsqueak.

Famine: At least tell us what happened between you and the boss man while you guys were gone.

Death goes to get her things ready while I get dressed in something other than my pajamas.

Now the penultimate question running through your heads is why Death decided to go for that kiss last night and why I decided to think of that idea of everyone getting in the room together? Why would something that seemed so contrived and forced happen? Isn't that a little convenient? Ah but see, it isn't contrived and forced at all.

First of all, this was sometime a coming. As Death had illustrated, she lived a life where persecution against her family was normal and the other Horsemen before this group didn't get along. Since no one cared about her up to that point, and the only ones who could were brutally killed, naturally she wouldn't be able to live a normal life or feel normal towards others. I'm guessing she's drawn towards me because I'm one of the few things in her life that provides a sense of normalcy and stability. Hell, my normal life before this was the singular thing that these guys probably deep down desired: something normal, something less than what short end of the stick they got.

Oh, and the whole shove in one room thing is a permanent thing. We're going to force ourselves to sleep in one room regardless of how comfortable everyone else is because we're going to get to know each other better. Once we do, we'll have the mental strength to face the Gravedusters.

Death came down the stairs wearing a casual t-shirt and skinny jeans. That complements her fairly well, I must say. She hands me, of all things, an apple.

Me: Look Thannat, you'll have to explain this one, but how if an apple going to get us to see the Gatekeeper? I figured we'd have to use a teleporter or portal, but what good would an apple do?

Death: The Gatekeeper likes snacks. He doesn't require material consumption to survive, but when we bring him things, he can transport us through portals.

Me: Can't he just come here himself and get food?

Death: No, we have to go to him. Even the Businessman had him.

She puts her hand on my shoulders and looks at me with concern.

Death: Look Andrew, you're going to have to be very polite when speaking to him. The Gatekeeper does not tolerate rudeness from anyone and will not hesitate to cause you misfortune even if you're an Agnum. Even though you may have many questions, take care to phrase them properly.

She reaches the apple towards the sky, and I grab onto it as well. We stand there for a couple seconds in awkward silence.

Death: Uh Andrew, you have to summon him.

Me: How do I summon him? Don't you guys do the contacting between him?

Death: We can't contact him when we're on this mission. Only the Agnum is allowed to contact. Say something, it's starting to look awkward that we're just standing here pointing.

Death blushes with embarrassment, and I look over at the other three Horsemen having a laugh about our predicament. We look like amateur fashion models trying to do a pose that will get us kicked out of the fashion business. Time to say something quick, it is getting awkward.

Me: Okay… how do I word this?

Me: **GATEKEEPER, HEED MY CALL. I REQUIRE TRANSPORT TO YOUR REALM BY PORTAL AT ONCE AND AM IN NEED OF YOUR ASSISTANCE IN FINDING ANSWERS. ANSWER MY SUMMONS AND GRANT ME SAFE AND SECURE PASSAGE TO YOUR LANDS. DO I HAVE YOUR GENUINE PROMISE THAT MY RETURN IS GUARANTEED?**

A 30 second pause. I'm starting to think I'm looking like a buffoon to the others.

Me: So Thannat, do you think it wo –

Gatekeeper: **YOUR SUMMONS HAS BEEN GRANTED AGNUM. CLOSE YOUR EYES AND STEP FORWARD. THE PORTAL IS DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF YOU.**

Me: Thank you my liege, ready for this Death?

Death: I was ready as soon as I accepted the role.

Death thinking: Except now, I have something to live for.

We hold the apple in front of us and step forward through the portal. Death already knew how this song and dance went, but I was shocked at the sheer size of the temple we stood in.

I'm talking size here, and I mean you will feel small. Like, Mount Everest would feel small if it got shoved in this temple, holy shit it's that big. It's 10 times the height of Mount Everest, which puts it about 290290 feet. There are golden Corinthian arches everywhere, making him out to be a fan of the Greeks. There's also Roman armor everywhere, and I get the feeling we're being watched by them. We're fucking ants, so I'm assuming whoever lives here must either be really huge or is really quick at getting around.

Gatekeeper: **AGNUM, YOU WHO ENTER MY CHAMBERS, WHAT ANSWERS DO YOU SEEK? HAVE MY 4 HORSEMEN BEEN UNSATISFACTORY TO YOU?**

I couldn't see where he was, and neither could Death. He must be very powerful if he can simultaneously spot us in this place, lead us in a portal exactly where he wanted to, and still find the time to confidently put all odds in his favor. I'm getting the feeling fucking with him was going to be a very bad idea.

Me: No sir, under no circumstances have they been a disappointment. They have been very satisfactory towards me. I have a few questions I wanted answered.


End file.
